Across Both Sides of the Mirror: A Look Back and Ahead
May 23rd will mark one year since I published my debut novel. And what a year it has been. A bit of a rollercoaster. Some thrilling highs. Some dreadful lows. When I first released my book, I wasn’t particularly wide-eyed or naive. Of course I was beyond excited to hold my story in my hands. An idea which had lived in my mind for years—and could’ve easily dwelled there forever—now existed in physical form. Wow. However, I also understood what came next wouldn’t exactly be a walk in the park. I knew as hard as it was to finish and release a book, THAT was the easy part.
But even as much as I tried to brace for impact, the collision was still damaging. I truly didn’t grasp the sheer amount of time, work, and effort it would take to make and keep my story visible; and the toll trying would take. My fellow writers, especially indie authors, I know you can relate. Hats off to you all *tips fedora*. But seriously, it’s a tall order: doing it all. Wearing all the hats. Figuring it all out on your own. Failure hits you like a wrecking ball. Success takes you on a nice hot air balloon ride. The whiplash is disorienting.
At some point, it became clear I simply couldn’t do everything. I was stretching myself too thin. Unless I was okay with coming apart, I had to let go of some things. Some balls would have to be dropped. I tried to hold on a little longer, believing I had the might and omnipotence to pull it off. Then, I heard that first snap, and I knew it was time to let go.
What I dropped: the pressure I put on myself to not mess up, to hit arbitrary benchmarks I self-assigned, to meet unrealistic deadlines, and to be on top of everything all the time. These expectations were dead weight.
What I held on to: my love of storytelling, my passion for writing, my first book baby, the incredible amount of support I’ve received, my excitement for what has already happened and what is yet to come. These were the things worth carrying.
Am I saying I’m never going to get hit by the wrecking ball again? No. However, as I’m almost one year into this journey, I’ve accepted the ebb and flow of authorship. It’s nothing to be fearful of, it’s merely something to experience and learn from. I’m thankful for the lessons. They’ve carried over to my holistic growth. I’m excited about what’s next.
As I’m typing this journal entry, I’m almost done writing my second novel (Woot!). Though I’m at the tail of the drafting process, things feel quieter this time around. Soon, I’ll be back on the publication route; but, it’s not a new path. I’ve been there before. Once. I remember some of the way, and I think I’ll know how to retrace my steps. At the same time, I’ve learned from my previous go round. Some of the road would have to be walked differently. And there is so much more I have yet to learn. I’m ready for it all: the wrecking ball, the hot air balloon ride, the lows, the highs.
I’m beyond thrilled to announce my second novel will be released in 2025! I absolutely love this story. It’s one of the things that kept me anchored over the last year. I cannot wait to share more about it soon. The other story that kept me grounded is the one turning one on May 23rd, 2024, Across Both Sides of the Mirror. The book that started it all and will forever hold a special place in my heart. If you haven’t yet, I highly recommend giving it a read, of course. And if you made it here, thank you for reading. Your support is the thing that has anchored me the most.
